That's Right

...it's The End.

Friday, December 21, 2012

we don't believe a word our heros said

"The only thing that stops a bad guy with a gun is a good guy with a gun." - Wayne LaPierre, NRA lobbyist, on having an armed officer in every school


This is the most terrifying bit of rhetoric I've heard all year. Yes, scarier than politicians saying that women's bodies will automatically protect themselves against pregnancy in the case of legitimate rape. Because most of the population is aware that this 'legitimate rape' nonsense is crazy talk spewed by an ignorant, sexist moron. Yes, the 'good guy with a gun' stuff is more insidious because a HUGE number of people buy into this.

I have three main problems with this wicked little cliche.

1. It's not even true. 

Quite often, two guns cause (surprise surprise) MORE damage than one gun. When we give up on creative solutions to our problems and assume that there is only ONE WAY to do things, we limit ourselves. A world filled with violence is our only option? Well I don't wanna live there!

2. It assumes that there will always be 'bad guys with guns' and that there's no way around it.


Well that's pretty hopeless. But I guess when you make your living promoting the use of guns, you're not primed to think that there could be any way to prevent this. Again, I don't want to live in your world.

3. It labels people as inherently bad, as if you're born that way and there's nothing we as a society can do about it.

I spend my days telling children that everyone in our class is good.
No one is bad.
We all make choices.
We can all make good choices, or bad choices.
Some people need more help making good choices, and it's our job to help them.
And we can help them because we're smart, kind people. And we can be patient with others.
'He started it' is not a good reason to hurt someone.
There are people you can go to when you feel in danger.

And then the children go home, and their parents tell them to stay away from the bad kids. The stigma starts at three years old, my friends. Telling your child to defend himself physically is one thing. Telling him that his peers are bad is... completely damaging in a way that's hard to undo. Can you even imagine what that does to your little child brain if you ever find out that the adults in your life think you're just flat out BAD? You probably can't imagine it. But if you could, it would probably make you want to punch someone. Whoever's the closest.

Maybe we can all wrap our heads around the fact that a three-year-old isn't bad. At some point, though, we draw a line. I guess it's the arbitrary age of 18? Sometimes younger? Then there is no more compassion or understanding of human development. There is no more help. There is jail sometimes. And sometimes there's just a gun.

So who's bad? Is it someone who grew up with no model for self-regulation, so that when someone bumps into them as an adult, they literally have no other strategy in their brain other than to retaliate physically? Is it someone who feels defeated every day because they are constantly fighting their own demons and the urge to end their life?
 

GUESS WHAT? If you were raised in a supportive home with no mental illness and a variety of opportunities that got you into the position of power where you are today, and you STILL can't come up with a more compassionate and creative solution than adding violence to violence and turning our schools into prisons, then MAYBE YOU'RE THE BAD GUY.

I don't want to live in this hypothetical world you've created, NRA dude and everyone who thinks like you. And you know who else doesn't want to live in this world?? MENTALLY ILL PEOPLE. People who are depressed and feel hopeless. Maybe if we created a different narrative for the actually awesome world we live in, people like this would feel a little more hopeful. Maybe violence could actually be prevented.

We live a beautiful life. But it's hard for some people. I want to teach my children that we can actually help each other out. That joy and kindness and mindfulness and positive thinking are (evidence-based!) ways to change the way we think and feel and act. Maybe it's too late for you to buy into this, but it's not too late for kids. So stay out of our schools.