police

I'm back in Maryland, a state which seems to be saying to me, Oh yeah? You spent a nice, relaxing, gorgeous, week on a cool lake with a constant, gentle breeze? Maybe Massachusetts boasts beautiful bodies of water, but you know what I've got? The most oppressive heat and humidity you've ever known, that's what!

Yes, Maryland. I get it. I didn't forget. As I sit here, lacking the modern wonder of air conditioning, I have to cool myself down the only way I can think of - by spreading out to create as much surface area on my body as possible, maximizing the amount of skin being hit by air from the fan. It brings me back to my days of living in Cumberland and Hagerstown, two of College Park's non air-conditioned high rises. I would lie on top of my covers and plaster one arm and one leg to the cinderblock wall, the coolest part of the room, until I was almost sideways. I'm also reminded of the hottest night of my life, the overnight train from Rome to Paris. That's a good memory.

Anyway, in honor of the heat, here are some temperature-related mad gabs:

• sew achoo cuff Ryan nag
• win elf Reese's sulfur
• my toss wallaby wok king Hawn thus hon
• police affix a rare corn dish awning