That's Right

...it's The End.

Monday, October 31, 2005

CBC's!


The fortune cookie is not aptly named. Maybe we should call them, "wise saying cookies" or "things that are somewhat likely to happen cookies" or "not all that helpful advice cookies."
I rarely get cookies with actual fortunes in them. One time I did, though. It said:
"You and your wife will be very happy in your life together."
That's good to know; she and I often worry about our future.

previous "fortunes" include:
"Accept the next proposition you hear."
This one could be dangerous.

"What is the distance between the eyes and the soul?"
I still can't figure this one out...any ideas?

"People find it difficult to resist your persuasive manner."
aka...Stop being so overbearing, Anna.

My dad's fortune the other night:
"If your desires are not too extravagant, your wishes will be granted."
aka...If you have low expectations, they'll probably come true.

My fortune:
"You look pretty."
More like...confidence booster cookies. Oh Hunan Manor, you really know how to make a girl feel special!

Sunday, October 30, 2005

nothing left for me to do but dance!


Then Jesus said to his disciples, "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it.”

I saw those verses in a new way today. Sometimes we look at them and think “denying ourselves” means not drinking or not having sex or giving away all our money. All those Christiany kinds of things. And maybe for some people, that is what they mean. But for me, denying myself has taken on new meaning.

This passage comes right after Jesus calls out one of His followers (pretty harshly, actually), saying that he is only thinking about himself, not about what God really cares about. So what does God care about? The most important thing to Jesus is relationships. I know this because when someone asks Him what the greatest commandment is, Jesus basically says, “love God, and love other people.” That’s it. Those are the most important things to Jesus – real relationships, putting other people first.

So when I think about what it means to deny myself, I have to think about how I live for myself when it comes to relationships. Basically, when I am doing things on my own strength, I shut people out. I end relationships. Why would I do that? Because it’s easier. As soon as it seems like someone doesn’t care about me, I want to act like I don’t care about them either. This instinct for self-preservation is pretty strong. I often don’t ask people what’s going on in their lives, because I don’t want to pry. I’m afraid they won’t want me to know. There are certain people that I’ve ignored for years, because I assume they don’t want to know me. I don’t want to put myself out there if I think people won’t appreciate it. I don’t initiate, because that would be awkward. I don’t want to be an awkward person. I’d rather be distant, snobby, and seemingly self-assured. This is how I’ve always pushed people away. How many people have I missed out on?

To deny myself is to put the focus back on what Jesus cares about: relationships. I’d like to live just one day where I could see all the opportunities to lay myself out on the line. To take every opportunity to be honest, awkward, and unashamed, if I really thought it was going to benefit someone else or make them feel loved. That’s part of what it means for me to deny myself. It means forgetting my insecurities and being completely myself with people because I know I might have something to offer them. Jesus has called me to offer myself to other people. That’s the only way to really have life. By relying on Him to do things His way.

At first I was skeptical when one of the sermons at my church was going to be about Napoleon Dynamite. I thought they were just trying to be trendy to attract people. Like, church isn't cool enough...let's add skateboards! Maybe if the pastor wore a Vote for Pedro shirt... Looking back, though, I see how true that message about Napoleon really was. He was someone who laid his extremely awkward self on the line: he did his dance in front of the whole school because Pedro needed a skit. He made himself completely vulnerable and risked being ridiculed in order to save his friend. He was unashamedly himself.

I will look for those opportunities. Please hold me to it.

Saturday, October 29, 2005

I want magic for my birthday too...

This is What It's Like to be a Princess
I want to be a princess. I want to have a baby princess too. And she got a cradle for her birthday present. I got magic, and I made a rainbow with it. Then the king and the queen come out and say it's time to have a meeting in the palace. And my baby just got a little crown. And I thought she would be a star. Her name was Anna. And then another princess came out and said it's time for the show of dances. Then it was night, and we saw a shooting star, and I made a wish that came true.
~by Kirsten Grothe

That's a story my sister dictated when she was in kindergarten or first grade. And I was just a baby star. One of the best things about coming home is that I go rummaging. I always find fun things from my childhood, and things that my siblings or I wrote when we were little are, by far, my favorite.
Here are some of the stories Kirsten wrote herself in first grade:


the fun spring time.
Once there lived a little girl and a little boy, and they just loved spring. in spring time they did all kinds of things, like rolling in the grass, and making mud pies and eating strawberry ice cream, and orange ice. but best of all they liked panting pictures. and then one spring day there mother said, we have to go get some thing's from the store now. but they refused to go. but finaly the mother said, then I'll go, and you kids go to the lingers. o.k. chilDren. o.k. mother. so they all lived
My Mom and me play together.
I like playing games with my mom! She is very very nice. The games we play are fun, we play socer, Trivia Adventure, and chese. one day we were walking with are cat and I triped and splat went that cat, and he was dead. And now we have another cat, and he bought a hat. the third cat bought a mat, but do cats have mony.
good and bad berry's.
berrys are good berrys are bad, ther are no such things that berrys have had. Do not ever eat berrys that are outside, unless you know that you're mom has planted them, and then thats o.k. but I want to tell you berrys are not the same, and thats the name. o.k? I am worried abuot you that you dont eat bad berrys. don't eat it o.k? and thats that. o.k?

Good thing when I become a teacher I'm gonna be able to sit around reading hilarious little kids' stories all the time. Kirsten is the sister who likes to say she was the dumb one of the family. Obviously, that is completely ridiculous, because these stories are sheer genius! And she was a crazy good speller and almost even knew how to use apostrophes correctly.
I tutor a first grader, and it makes me sad because he doesn't even know how to rhyme. He doesn't get excited about anything and just gives me one word answers to questions I have. He doesn't know the difference between his vowel sounds, and I wish I could work on those with him, but instead his teacher gives me a story about the seasons and tells me he should be able to read it, because that's what the rest of the class is able to do. Vowels are kinda crucial to reading. Background knowledge is also crucial to reading, and he doesn't know what the seasons are. And he couldn't explain to me what season means anyways. And I asked him when snow falls, and he said "on the ground." It honestly breaks my heart.
Kids are all over the place. You look at a room full of first graders, and there will be kids like that and kids like my sister. I've gotta figure out how to handle that, how to meet both of those kids where they are and help them to grow. I'm not sure how much one person can really do that, but I'm up for the challenge.
After all, I am a princess and a star.

Sunday, October 23, 2005

43 things

I've discovered the most fantastic website. It's just the thing to feed my ridiculous list obsession.

It's kinda cool though, cause I like to think about the things I want to do before I die, and now not only can I store them all, I can also see people who also want to do them and people who have actually done them. For instance, there are several people who want to learn to run up a wall and do a flip. And there was someone else who has done it, and gave them all advice. (Just let go of your fears and run up the wall. As you get better, start taking more steps.)

Once you do something on your list, you can move it to the category of "things you've done." I have 2 pretty nice lists going.

I was just thinking about how that would be a cool activity with my kids. First have them each list 5 things they want to do someday. (or I could make it more specific - something they want to learn how to do or places they want to go) Then we could listen to them as a class and see which things other students have actually done. And eventually, maybe we could all as a class learn to do some of those things or take a trip to some of those places.

But that's the kind of thing you can only do with older grades. I'll be certified up through third, so third graders could definitely do this. I've always imagined myself teaching younger grades, though. But, honestly, third graders would be so cool, since they are more able to actually create goals and dreams for themselves and for the world.

I remember in first grade, we learned about Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. and his "I have a dream" speech. But of course, none of us really understood what his dream was. Racial equality, what? All I remembered was that phrase. Then, we were all supposed to draw a picture and write what our dream was. I don't remember what I wrote. I only remember that Chris Tran drew me in his picture and gave me pink hair. Pff, who did he think he was? And I remember a kid saying his dream would be to make killing people illegal. Then Miss Himes told us that killing people was, indeed, illegal.

What I'm trying to say is that first graders don't think that big yet. They are amazing, but you can't do all the awesome activities with them that you can do with kids maybe in middle school. Alas, I have chosen early childhood education, as I am most interested in development in the younger years. I can only go up to third grade unless I (and I don't particularly feel like it right now) get another degree. So would I want to teach third? Can you even do cool activities like I just made up? Does it fit into reading, math, or science? Maybe social studies. Is there even time for that in the curriculum now? Or will I simply have to drill them to prepare for tests, leaving all their creativity, planning, and dreams behind?

Honestly, I'm not trying to be a bitter education major. Direct instruction is great. I just know that the public school classrooms I have been in lately are crazy. The teachers use specific methods that the school board probably outlined for them and pack in material so fast that the kids don't get a chance to think. I've seen teachers do reading lessons from basal readers, and all the comprehension questions come directly out of the book. Is she even allowed to make up her own questions? Are teachers given so little credit that creativity is not allowed in the classroom?

I really don't think I'll be able to handle that.

Wow, this post went quickly from "I found a fun website" to "what is the educational system coming to!?" and for that, I apologize.

Seriously, go here and make your own list of incredible things. And then, start doing them while you have the chance!!!

Saturday, October 22, 2005

great Googley moogley

Everyone loves Googling themselves, but I discovered a new game. This is what Google has to say about me: (well, these are my favorites anyway)

  • Anna is very concerned about people's weight because of the health issue.
  • Anna is very nearly killed as she rushes to investigate.
  • Anna is very talented.
  • Anna is very happy she undertook the dating series.
  • Anna is very capable of being a respectful and caring child at home and at school.
  • Anna is very happy to report that just recently she was able to re-establish contact with her niece Annie and daughter Mannie Mae.
  • Anna is very courageous and daring. She is the one who undertakes to climb up the ladder in order to remove the street sign.

  • Anna really needs her daughter's father.
  • Anna really needs to be harder on herself.
  • Anna really needs the Lord’s help, because she does not know the number of people who will be present at each meal!
  • Anna really needs to take the meisner method acting class.
  • Anna really needs to get off it! She thinks she is the best thing in the world.
  • Anna really needs to work on her people skills.
  • Anna really needs an unconditional friend.

Try it; it's fun!

Friday, October 21, 2005

GRRRRR

Sometimes, people make me angry.
Today, that's pretty much the theme.

Instead of a rant about the ridiculousness caused by the people around me, here's a vague list of types of people who make me angry (only the ones that apply to today, though).

1. people who cause trouble where there is none and don't get their facts straight
2. people who don't do what they are clearly supposed to be doing
3. people who don't pay attention to what you tell them

If you happen to ask me about any of these vague things that happened today, I probably will rant, so be warned!

Monday, October 17, 2005

hahahaha

I just got this email from the sitter service website thing I used this summer:
"Sitters/Nannies Beware of Scams

Recently a parent by the name of
Rossy Joss has sent emails to nannies and sitters that are members of major sitting websites including 4sitters.com. The person has been removed and we have reported this matter.

Do not fall victim to Nigerian scams and check fraud. Some aliases used: Rossy Joss, Mark Kennebeck, Adam James and Mark Adam are trying to defraud au pairs; nannies...

...The story often changes, but it always smells a bit like fish. In this particular case, the Nigerian scammer uses stolen credit cards, creates family accounts and poses as an American family, who sends premature "job offer" emails to hire au pairs and nannies. The scammer requests the au pair/nanny's home address so he can send a bogus check (usually $3,000 - $8,000) as a supposed advance payment...Before the check clears the au pair/nanny bank account, the Nigerian scammer sends another email stating that his wife and daughter (or twin daughters in some cases) have died in a car accident and then he requests that the au pair/nanny send him a new check as he no longer needs au pair or nanny services. His ploy is to send you a bogus check and then have you send him a good check or other form of instant payment. He will be insistent that you urgently send a new check or wire money to a bank account (with someone else's name) or send a cash payment by Western Union (to someone else's name) or other similar means. If you tell him you're not going to send him a payment, he will become instantly threatening and even hostile. He'll claim to call the FBI or the police. Don't worry, the FBI is on our side and they are already working on this case to apprehend the entire Nigerian crime ring. Just ignore the scammer's emails.

Thank you."

You mean...it was all a lie? The water skiing? The snowmobiling? The fabric production chemicals importations trade??? Say it isn't so!

But seriously, the entire thing leaves me with a few questions...it took them from July until October to figure out this was a scam? How many naive au pairs did these people rip off before anyone did anything about it?

As it turns out, she was not a robot or a murderer, but...a member of a Nigerian crime ring?? What? And why did they keep calling this a "Nigerian scam"? I'm pretty sure it's not a typically Nigerian thing to do.

Weird. That's all. Just weird.

Sunday, October 16, 2005

get jealous

So Taylor has an interesting view on the dramatic life of an Event Manager (pretty sure we're the only 2 nerds at the Chapel who blog about their escapades in great detail...but hey, we're also the coolest, so maybe there's some kinda correlation).

Saturday, October 15, 2005

let the Madness begin...

So tonight started it all...

another season with all the glory and all the agony, the joy and the pain, satisfaction and aggravation...

basketball season for the Terps!!!


That's right, tonight was that famed night..."Maryland" Madness!!! So, maybe it didn't start at midnight. As devoted to tradition as I am, I can handle the change. We still got to see Gymkana jump through the Ring of Fiiiiiiiiire. We still got to sing along to Zombie Nation in the dark with a laser light show on the floor. Testudo was still there. We still got to see the ever-popular alumni game, with Darien Henry and Mike Grinnon doing a cameo. There were even fireworks that heated all of Comcast Center. Pretty spectacular.

Two years ago, Gary rode out on a motorcycle. Last year, it was Nascar. During the thrilling women's game, we brainstormed possible Gary Entrances for this year...

on a horse?

bungee jumping through a trap door?

ropeswinging?

base jumping?

in a monster truck that breaks d
own the walls?
surfing on a wave that floods the court?
hang gliding?

The possibilities were endless!!!


The lights were down, and the smoke was on, and we were ready for each team member to run out as they were announced...and then, they all just moseyed out at a normal pace as if they were walking to class or something. How anti-climactic. Where was the buildup, the emotion? Gary even came with them. No bungee jumping. No monster truck. Just plain old Gary.

But then I flashed back a year in my head...
Nik Caner-Medley comes out and puts his hand to his ear, motioning for everyone to cheer louder for him. DJ Strawberry is on his cell phone, cause he just doesn't even
care he's so cool. This year, things are a lot different.

So I think...I like the group entrance. It wasn't about being all-stars or divas. It was about being a team. It's in a way symbolic of the change that has happened since last year. They will not be ball-hogs. They will not be arrogant. They will not think they are more important than each other. They will be Terps, not future NBA players. Gary doesn't need a fancy car. He needs basketball players and fans. And he's got both.


It's always hard to tell what the season is gonna look like from the scrimmage. They're playing against each other, so it's not like anyone's heart is really in it. I will say that Sterling Ledbetter seems like he's advanced a little. Also, there are two new guys. DJ was back on the court, wearing a knee brace. Chris couldn't play due to a sprained ankle, so I hope he's back on his feet soon! Mike Jones was his usual dynamic self, and everyone else looked familiar too.

After freshman year, I was promising everybody that we were going to win the NCAA the next year. And I really did mean it. I had complete faith in our team, despite the inconsistencies. The NIT loss came as a shock to me, so I know I can't make any promises about the outcomes of games this year. I can say this, though...the agony and glory, pain and joy, aggravation and satisfaction will be there. My heart will get dragged all over the court, and I wouldn't trade it for the world. The true fans will be there all season, and the Terps will defy expectations, as usual. With a little bit more perspective and unity gained from last year's experience, the team is looking good.


Who knows, there might even be a little poetry from this end...
Comcast, it's good to be back.

MISSING:

one pair of women's Puma track pants
photo taken 5/05
answers to:
"Puma Pants"
size:
not exactly sure, S I guess
color:
navy with white stripes down the legs and pink trim along the white stripes
other noticeable markings:
pink embroidered puma on the knee, identical puma on the back waist
reward:
I dunno, maybe
last seen:
California? this does not look good...
value:
priceless! they're so comfy! I don't even like sweatpants!

Anyone with information leading to the recovery of my beloved Puma Pants will be rewarded accordingly. If not monetarily, then at least by the joy that will fill your heart upon seeing my face when my legs are reunited with their rightful apparel.

update: My mama found my pants in the basement!! And tried to pretend she doesn't read this!! Wahoooooooo!!!

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

can dogs even get asthma?

Tonight, we had a little nerd meeting. One more link in the blogosphere. Five people having a conversation, one of whom I was meeting for the first time, realized we all stalk each other.

The thing about being a stalker is, you can handle it in a few ways:
  1. You can be upfront about it.
    "So I noticed that at 5:40 am this morning, you were really worried about your dog's asthma. Is everything okay?"
  2. You can feign ignorance.
    "Yeah, we were at hospital with my dog all night."
    "Dude, what's wrong with your dog?!"
  3. You can feign ignorance, and then be upfront.
    "I didn't get any sleep last night."
    "Why not?"
    "I was at the hospital with my dog."
    "Yeah, I saw the x-rays of his lungs!"
I am personally an option 3 kinda girl. So anyways, Farrell's friend Tony spoke at IV tonight about using what we've been given to make a difference in the world. I met him afterwards, and he said, "Are you the one who had a crazy shiver in the middle of my talk?"
Oh man.
"I remembered you talking about it before," he said, "and then there it was!" Once again, this was the first time I had ever met him. People are known for many things. This is my curse. I am the shivering girl.

But I digress. Another way you can handle blogging, as Tony does, is to meet other random people in Arizona who have blogs, and then they'll ask you to come visit them and speak to some high schoolers, and fly you out for free.

I try not to talk about my blog too much, cause it's kinda embarrassing, but if this is a community of people who buy other people plane tickets cause they like what they have to say, then I am just gonna have to start checking out some Parisian blogs. Maybe I can win someone over with my American wit.

Eiffel Tower, here I come!

Monday, October 10, 2005

Steph makes better analogies

I had a realization this afternoon.
Sleep, to me, is an abusive boyfriend.

He's no good for me. I end up wasting half my life away just to stay in bed.
After I wake up at noon on a Monday, I realize I don't need him. I could do so much better with my life! I could've just gotten up at 9. Why didn't I??

I tell him, "I'm leaving you. I have other people who need me. I have homework. I need to clean the apartment, talk to my roommates, be a healthy person."

"But baby, I love you," he says, "and you love me too."

And of course, he always wins. I might set the alarm for 9, but I always go back to him. It's ruining my life.

But I guess I wouldn't have it any other way. I mean, sleep really is good to me; you just don't understand.

Friday, October 07, 2005

hope none of my non-friends are reading this

My new favorite thing to do at work is listen to a cappella from the balcony while rain pours down on the roof above me. It's amazing.

They've all been here a lot recently, making for some awkward moments as I repeatedly run into all my a cappella acquaintances. We've got the type of relationships where we pretend not to really know each other. Since I've worked several a cappella concerts in the last few weeks, they probably think I live here. Which I guess I do.

I kinda got nostalgic for the time Lindsey, Ena, and I went shopping in Georgetown freshman year. We ran into the Faux Paz, and they invited us to go to Johnny Rocket's with them. The waiter gave us a weird look, since the three of us had already been there that day, but we probably gave him a weird look when he started dancing in the middle of the restaurant as we, along with a group of girls from Howard, serenaded him with our rendition of Rockin' Robin. It was a good night.

It's weird, all the people I meet, all the mutual friends we have, but to this day, I see them on campus and we pretend we don't know each other. I love people, but it takes a lot to become friends with me.

So I sit in the balcony by myself, watching the Generics and Faux Paz, and get nostalgic for the first two years of my college life and all my a cappella-filled memories.

And the rain, especially, is a nice touch. So yeah, that's my new favorite thing. Almost as good as singing in the front of the Chapel after everyone's left and hearing my own terrible voice echoing throughout the entire place. I mean, it's a close call.

Thursday, October 06, 2005

I wanna be a documentary photographer.

Okay, I just wanna make a documentary.

Monday, October 03, 2005

13 Going on 30

The only movie that ever made me cry was The Fox and The Hound. That was, until last year or so. I shed a single tear during 13 Going on 30. I may have mentioned this before, but I didn't really explain why.


There is something about that movie that just hits me. I think it's the overwhelming theme in the movie that you can't go back. For better or worse, you've made choices, and that's your life. Most people can connect with regret.
Jenna finds out at the age of 30 that she has led a terrible life. She has deserted her true friends and used everyone around her for power and popularity, both in high school and as an adult. She asks her former friend Matt what happened - when did they stop being friends? What had she done to him? He tries to shrug it off because it's in the past.


We try not to let ourselves care about the past because it's gone. We try to forget the ways we were hurt because time is supposed to heal things. But Jenna approaches things with a childlike urgency. She needs to know what happened. She needs to let herself experience the pain she caused other people. When she finds out, there's just regret. Knowing that you can't change the past is such a heavy thought, and there's no way around it.

As much as I'm a fan of movies where people throw logic to the wind and follow their hearts, there's something to be said for a movie that shows you can't always do that. It's just more real.


But then it still has a good ending, cause let's face it, it's a chick flick.

Saturday, October 01, 2005

Halloween

Sometimes I get really disappointed when I realize, I will never be able to go trick-or-treating again. Sure, when I adopt kids someday, I can take them out on Halloween. I can even dress up if I'm that kind of parent. But I can't hold out a pillowcase and get candy. I feel cheated. I want candy in my pillowcase!

So, I'll do what I always do when good times are gone forever; I'll reminisce. The thing about being a kid is, you live for holidays. As soon as the 4th of July was over, this innate Halloween obsession kinda kicked in. Stores may start commercializing a month or so too early, but I was always ahead of them. I spent hours drawing faces so that I could achieve the perfect jack-o-lantern when the time came. I brainstormed costumes until I found the perfect one. And no way would you ever find a Grothe buying a pre-made Spiderman or Belle costume. We were costume snobs. Everything had to be homemade. These are the ones I can remember...I may be missing some.


Picture it: MacGills Common, 1989

It's my first Halloween of trick-or-treating. I am Little Red Riding Hood. I'm wearing a little red jogging suit and a red cape, and my cheeks are supe
r rosy, cause my parents had this thing for applying ridiculous amounts of cosmetics to our faces on Halloween or special occasions. I venture out with my dad to the next-door neighbor's house to find him dressed as a werewolf and (so I'm told) run home scared. Well, we worked past that hurdle, and I was out collecting what would become my annual stash of Tootsie Rolls,
Milky Ways, and Twizzlers in no time.
4 years old:
pumpkin
5 years old:
ballerina
6 years old:
baby
8 years old (sorry, what happened to 7):
Indian (interesting)
9 years old:
This one is my personal favorite, the pièce de la résistance. My friend Mandy and I were, jointly, the Magic Carpet. Inspired by Aladdin, we covered cardboard with Persian rug-looking material and attached tassels to the corners. We cut holes in the rug so we could stick our heads through. Wearing black clothing, we thought, would create the illusion that the carpet was flying through the air. We even had a golden genie lamp on th
e rug. It didn't bother us a bit that no one had a clue what we were; it just gave us a chance to explain it to them.
10 years old:
Pajama Girl (my creativity must've been spent from the last year)
11 and 12 years old:
Renaissance lady (stolen costume from my sister who made it for APMEH)
13 years old:
I was a bat. Then when I got to my friend's house, everyone else was dressed as Wizard of Oz characters and hadn't told me. Oh well.

That was kind of the end until senior year, when my friends and I decided we could go trick-or-treating again. And by this time I didn't have a defined costume. I just wore lots and lots of crazy ridiculous things.

This year I'd like to bring back the tradition of working hard on a creative costume...so, what'll it be?
ideas anyone???


Haha, I was trying to f
ind pictures to go with my various cos
tumes, but instead I found these:



And I just threw that last one in cause it's my cousin's baby a few years ago! His name is Maximilien, and he is awesome.